Monday, March 24, 2008

Rolling that Rock of Love Off a Cliff

There's nothing like celebrating Easter with a little Rock of Love 2, starring hair band frontman Bret Michaels and an assortment of bandanas that I truly hope are American-made.

I spent much of the episode wondering if Bret has a soul. After watching him plead for donations to aid the victims of the 2003 Station nightclub fire in Rhode Island, I am beginning to think he might. However, it doesn't explain why he insists that the winner of the cheesy competition for his so-called love must not have any emotional or physical attachments to other men, while he remains free to spread his bodily fluids around with whomever will accept them.

To find out the truth about the contestants in the "house of lies," Bret summoned the former lovers of Ladies of Low Self-Esteem. In the hopes of getting the boys to rat out their exes, he tried to get them loaded at a bar in a mall. Judging by the expressions on some of their faces (particularly Ambre's friend, who seemed like a geniunely decent guy), they saw Bret for the poseur he truly is. I don't think hanging out in a mall bar jibed with their idea of the life of a rock star. Or even the life of a guy who pretends to be a rock star, like Bret.

At the end of the show, Bret eliminated Megan, the 22-year-old who calls everybody over the age of 30 -- except Bret -- "old." Last week, she sniped that 32-year-old Ambre couldn't keep up because, "What do you expect? She's an old lady."

Yeah, well, the old lady is still 13 years younger than Bret Michaels. Heck, she's probably younger than some of his bandanas.