Wednesday, November 14, 2007

How to Meet People

Shortly after I moved to Connecticut, I read an article in the New York Times that claimed that New Englanders in general and Connecticut residents in particular did not welcome newcomers.

The article ran a rash of quotes by transplants who'd repeatedly been shunned. It made enough of a splash that my children's doctor, also a former New Yorker, mentioned it and said that he'd had similar experiences.

It has not been my experience.

After moving here, another former New Yorker invited me to join a wellness group that met at a friend's house. My first instinct was to say no. I had little interest in sitting around discussing the virtues of high colonics with a pack of bored housewives.

But I went. What I found was a fun, wine-drinking, engaging, intelligent group of women who later introduced me to other people like them. This led to invitations to amazing parties, nights out, connections, you name it.

I also joined Toastmasters. If you've been with me a while, you know I recommend this group to the shy folk (it helps build confidence!), but it's just great for anybody who wants to meet ambitious people with an interest in helping each other succeed. You're not going to meet a lot of losers at Toastmasters.

If you're stuck in a rut and meeting the same people day after day, shake it up. Take a chance. You know what? Maybe every single person you meet will already be married, but they may very well know somebody who isn't.

Widen your social circle, Make new friends of both sexes. One of these days, you will meet somebody special.

Five years ago, I didn't have a social life in Connecticut. Tonight I am having a party for 20 people. They all live in Connecticut, the state where supposedly it's impossible to make friends.