Saturday, July 14, 2007

Dating Advice From Dianne Brill

Peter worked today, so I decided to clean out the basement.

I'm not the type of person who would ever set out to do such a thing without prodding, so Peter gently suggested that I go through my 48 boxes of books I haven't opened since we moved here four years ago, sort them, and decide which ones to keep and which to donate to the libary. I started at 9AM, didn't take a break until 2, and there's still a boatload of stuff for me clear out down there.

During this session, I came upon two interesting items.

The first was a letter from an old friend apologizing for making out with my then-boyfriend. Now, I haven't seen this girl in years, and I actually kind of miss her. The guy (obviously) turned out to be a jerk (in numerous ways), and I don't miss him at all. Never even think of him.

Her letter said that he'd led her to believe our relationship had ended, which she soon realized was a lie. After she went home to England, I told him to get lost. He resumed pursuing me ardently (some would call it stalking), but by then I'd moved onto a marginally better guy.

The other interesting item I found in the basement?

It was Dianne Brill's how-to book, Boobs, Boys, and High Heels or How to Get Dressed In Just Under Six Hours. In case you don't know Dianne (she's on the right in the 1986 photo with Ozzy Osbourne and Janis Savitt), she became known as Queen of the Night in the 80s due to her constant presence on the NYC club scene. I liken her to a benevolent Paris Hilton without the destructive tendencies.

I hadn't thought about her for years until I happened upon her book. Then I did a search and found her website. Apparently, she's selling her own line of makeup these days.

Boobs, Boys, and High Heels sparkles with Ms. Brill's wit and wisdom. Here's one highlight:

"The bad date does not exist. Believe me, I've been on all kinds, and I've discovered that all are love experiments, learning experiences (even if what you learn is what you don't want), and good dating practice. I've survived a lot of dates a lot of you babes probably dread."

The joker who made out with my friend certainly qualifies as a learning experience. In retrospect, I'd call him less a love experiment than a science experiment. What a doofus!



Light Yellow with a touch pink said...

could i ask you a question:

i like a guy you know and he went to my school and i talked to this girl about him because we were both friends with him and so she was there and we went on a 1 week class trip a 6- hour drive to D.C and i told him i liked him and he said he had a girlfriend that he couldnt hae two girlfriends

did that mean he wanted to go out with me?
then 2 days before graduation 10 days later he started madly talkign to me you know he seemed intrested i didnt respond i dont know whats wrong with me and then he went and asked that girl out instead after i had talked to her about everything and she knew how i felt about him and there was a dance dinner after grad and all the girls in a our grade came like 20 girls and everybody knew i liked hinm and nobody could tell me and i broke down when i foun out all she said was im sorry

i just understand what to do with myslef

Terry said...

You're understandably in a lot of pain. Being rejected, especially when it involves a friend, is the absolute worst.

Fortunately, you told the guy how you felt about him, so there's no misunderstanding there. There's nothing wrong with you. He's chosen this other girl over you, and as much as that hurts, be open to the possibility that it may be for the best.

I don't really know what to say about the girl he asked out. It must feel terrible to have confided in her. But, again, you did nothing wrong. You thought she could be trusted.

It's cliche, but there really is something to the old saying, "If you love something, it will come back to you. If it doesn't, it never was."

Five years from now, you may run into this guy on the street and thank God your 'friend' went out with him, and you didn't.

That's happened to me a few times.