Thursday, May 14, 2009

Romance Thrives on Mystery and Anticipation

Every day of the week, a new device comes on the market that promises to simplify life for us. For the most part, they're great. But they could also be killing your chances for love.

First, the obvious:

Men still complain that too many women whip out a device on a first date and monitor it all night long for calls and text messages.

A woman (or man, for that matter) who wants a second date shouldn't be checking a device, unless she has children, in which case she can tell the guy, "I've instructed my children (or babysitter) to contact me only in case of emergency. Otherwise, I promise not to let this thing distract me."

Second, the less obvious:

Too many women are mistaking a series of text messages for a relationship. A relationship is eye-to-eye. LOL and laughing out loud are two very different experiences.

Which would you prefer?

Laughing out loud in the presence of a funny, smart, cute man who thrills you? Or tapping out a string of characters to the same guy and finishing it off with "LOL?"

Two different experiences, indeed.

Women are texting too much. Too much texting = no mystery. How are you going to get a guy to think about you, dream about you, wonder where you are and what you're doing if you you're telling him all day long?

Remember, no mystery = no romance. If you want a guy to take you for granted, text your heart out.

Otherwise, limit texting for critical communication (you're running late, for example). Give him a reason to want to see you. If he tries to engage you in a lengthy text conversation, text back, "Sorry. Busy. Meet up sometime?"

You've put the ball in his court. You've let him know you have a life, but you're interested enough to meet him face-to-face. That way, you can gauge his interest, instead of having to wonder if he wants to be your boyfriend or just another text buddy.


Tina T said...

I couldn't agree more about the whole texting thing. I don't think that most of us do enough exciting things to give a running update, and of course the things that really are worth sharing should be shared in person not via text. No mystery plus very little personal interaction does not make for a meaningful relationship.

How To Attract Men said...

I absolutely agree! Texting really can kill the mystery and romance in a new relationship. If you want to be just great friends go for it, but this will not likely turn into the wild romantic adventure you have been dreaming about!