I recently received an email from a woman whose friends and family have told her she's too picky, and that she should worm her way into men's hearts by baking them little treats. In 2008!
She said she tried it, and it didn't work (of course it didn't work; talk about begging a guy to take you for granted).
She describes herself as successful, shy, and introspective. She doesn't want to meet men in clubs. I don't blame her; it's impossible to tell if a guy is worth your time when you can barely hear him over thumping music.
I neglected to recommend that she spend more time in bookstores (I'll write to her again to remedy this). Bookstores are perfect for meeting people because you never look funny going in alone, or even sitting alone in the cafe looking through a book and listening to music. And books make great conversation starters.
Interestingly a cruise planner, with whom I hope to put together a getaway for fun-oriented females, told me today that the manager of a major chain bookstore informed her that his busiest 'adult nights' are Wednesdays and Thursdays.
If I hoped to meet an intelligent guy, I'd make a point of popping into my favorite bookstore on an 'adult night,' finding a couple of books to look through, and sitting down with a big fat latte. And I'd become a regular.
My favorite bookstore happens to be a newly-opened independent, and already it's becoming a hub for fun and interesting people. In addition to books and good coffee, the owner offers a roster of author appearances and a weekly workshop for fiction writers.