tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9378354.post6166417713175423973..comments2023-07-03T05:28:29.391-04:00Comments on Dating Advice (Almost) Daily: Is He Worth It?Terryhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00260512756626485548noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9378354.post-73141847749640952292009-07-24T19:47:41.400-04:002009-07-24T19:47:41.400-04:00mmm...I can see where all the commentators are com...mmm...I can see where all the commentators are coming from, but to me they all appear to be coming from a place of defense.<br /><br />To me the writer seems to be coming from a place of self acceptance. If she is anything like me, perhaps she sees the irony of the tables being turned...for instance, what if it was she who had a nervous breakdown..and who presumed the guy wouldn't be interested in her any more ..so started testing the waters.If a guy just brushed me off after I had been through such trauma Id think he was callous. We also don't know how long they were dating for. If it was only a short while you can understand the situation evolving as it has.<br /><br />I like to think that people treat others with kindness. I am going to go against the general grain of advice here. If you like him as a person, keep in touch with him as a friend. Set your boundaries. Make him work hard for your attention, but don't write him off. Doing this does not mean you have low self esteem. Quite the contrary. <br />Best wishesAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9378354.post-66645385196532751672009-07-23T12:45:36.824-04:002009-07-23T12:45:36.824-04:00two possibilities. one, he's sees you as a fri...two possibilities. one, he's sees you as a friend and was just casually complaining about his new girl. or two, he is really unhappy and is sounding you out so that he can keep you as a "backup" when his latest relationship fails. <br /><br />if it's the second, forget it. you ought to be pissed off, not ensnared. he doesn't even respect you as a person, much less love you.<br /><br />either way, even if he remembers you fondly, you have already moved on and have been seeing other guys. do yourself a favour and keep falling back on the dignity that you possess. <br /><br />breaking up is hard to do. one try for each relationship is good enough. you may not have a serious boyfriend now, but you have a lot of other intangible things, such as your dignity, your self respect, the respect of your friends, your self esteem. this guy may have been amazing to you before, but that was all in the past. don't give up what you have for someone who doesn't care about you. <br /><br />if you keep your self confidence and wits about you, you will definitely find another guy who's much better.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9378354.post-60470420849879341802009-07-23T09:29:45.019-04:002009-07-23T09:29:45.019-04:00How amazing is a guy who disappears, has a break d...How amazing is a guy who disappears, has a break down, stays out of touch for a year, get's a new girlfriend and then looks her up? Your advice is right on target! You have a wonderful, gentle way of looking at situations and providing your perspective. <br /><br />My take away is that this woman has managed to let all the good things overshadow the pain she must have felt to be abandoned. So many women are good at this. <br /><br />What I tell my dating coaching clients is to take a step back and observe objectively. This gives them a chance of seeing the big picture which includes all the good and hthe ugly. That's the best way to make realistic, healthy relationship decisions.Ronnie Ann Ryan - The Over 40 Dating Coachhttp://www.after40datingtips.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9378354.post-66222593440296407312009-07-23T04:48:06.449-04:002009-07-23T04:48:06.449-04:00You give really good advice. I do believe that mos...You give really good advice. I do believe that most of the time, when we women ask questions, somewhere inside of us, we already know the answer. I am very skeptical of men who reappear in their old girlfriends lives wanting to be "friends." Sounds like he wants to keep her on the back burner, just in case. But none of us deserve to be the "just in case" girl.Evehttp://freeadviceforwomen.comnoreply@blogger.com